Michelangelo’s “Uh-oh”

The other day I, was walking by in heaven with a halo on my head

While I saw the angels sing Hallelujahs and eat their manna spread

And along came Moses with his rod and a really shiny face

I saw him chase me and I took off like I was in a race


I met some angels as I ran- by the crystal sea

I told them the story that linked good ol’ Moses and me.

I told them the story and they laughed along & let out chirpy giggles

You should watch them laugh-its almost scary: the way their eyebrows wiggle

I have this hilarious story to tell you about a sculpture of Moses that I made

You wouldn’t believe that for it, the Pope even got me paid

I guess I read scripture from a bible that wasn’t translated very well

I’m not sure if it was poor judgement from the translator or a word that was misspelled


There’s this portion in Exodus 34 where Moses’s face shines like gold

And people who saw him shine- their excitement couldn’t withhold

You see this portion in scripture: was somehow mistranslated or misquoted

And it was an earnest mistake by some translator -who was like us devoted


The translation was messed up. Instead of “his face shone”, the translator wrote “his face was horned”

And that is why when I made a sculpture of Moses, his head was with two big horns adorned

It makes for a funny story and it’s at Moses’ expense for sure

But I want you to look at this differently- with an attitude that’s pure.

The Horned Moses by Michelangelo, Rome. Yep. No wonder we make fun of him in heaven.


It’s really easy to misquote or mistranslate scripture- and even what people say for that matter

But there is so much damage done and raises constant conflicting chatter

Poor old Moses was never horned but it was only his face that was shiny

But the damage was done to Moses’ repute though the translator’s mistake was tiny


I know that is an exaggeration -but learn this while you can

Tiny mistakes (that are actually big) happen when you’re not a careful man.

It’s really easy to speak and talk with your mouth and your wagging tongue

But when your speech is not carefully laced with grace, your words will stink like dung


Tiny noises in the snowy hills are what start avalanches that are massive

So make sure you have a grip on your tongue and don’t ever be passive!

Don’t be like Mr. Translator Man who made a tiny mistake while he jotted

For that mistake was read and subscribed to- and Moses’ fame was blotted.


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